Drastic change

I kind of want to do something.

Like cut my hair.  Or get another piercing.  I’ve actually been thinking about this for a while, but who knows if it will actually happen.

Anyway, today is the last day of March which I fear will be my last day of sanity for a while.

April does not look so hot right now.

Reckless

It’s strange for me to feel this way.  I’m not sure why I do and it confuses and somewhat frightens me.  I am usually a pretty level headed person.  If anything, I think too much about what I’m doing.  But right now, I feel like I could do something completely idiotic and get away with it.  Which makes me question my state of mind.

Knowing me, this feeling will pass rather quickly and I will return to my boring old self.  I would rather not do something stupid that I would regret.

Right?

I blame the weather.

I still remember when love was enough

So this ridiculously long winter break is driving me somewhat insane.  I know I should be glad that I get so much time off, but I feel like my brain is rotting away as I watch hours of Discovery and Food Network.  Seriously, I’m not a big tv person but this break was just…something else.

Anyway, my point is that too much free time gives me too much time to let my mind wander and think too much.  I overanalyze the stupidest things, I create alternate scenarios in my mind, and I daydream about possible futures.  It’s pretty stupid and frustrating, and almost always ends up with me being unsatisfied with how things are right now.

I guess my thing of the year should really be trying to find a way to be content with what life gives me at the moment.  This doesn’t mean that I won’t try and make things better for myself, but I shouldn’t be constantly thinking “what if” or “why didn’t I” or anything of that nature.  I realize that this is a pretty lofty goal for me, but I’m going to keep at it for the sake of my sanity, well-being, and happiness.

But there are certain things that I can’t fix on my own.  I’ll leave that up to time.

—–

I just read my horoscope for today.

“Focusing on one relationship is really not a good idea.  Spread the love.”

Hah.  I guess it’s the kick in the butt I need.